Dear Culture,

You and I have been friends a long time.  I've been shaped by you.  I've surrounded myself with you.  I've worked to transform you.  But you are a part of me and I am a part of you.  We've had some laughs, mainly at my expense.  I've made some crazy choices because of my weakness and your influence.  But you have taught me a lot as well.  But I am a follower of Jesus too.  Your influence on me has changed since He showed me His Way and His love.  Don't worry, I'm still a part of you, but He has called me to live differently, to think differently, to love differently.  That's why I am writing to you today. 

You've taught me to be a tolerant person.  Or maybe you just reminded me of the tolerance Jesus showed towards others.  You've helped me to become friends with people of all kinds of backgrounds, religions, lifestyle choices, etc . . . You've helped me make room for them in my life.  I love them.  I don't even feel the need to argue with them over beliefs and choices.  I just trust that if I am am faithful and loving, they will see the Jesus that I claim to follow and want what He has given me.  I don't avoid the topics of faith when it is presented or when there is a logical opportunity to talk about Him . . . I can talk about God all day long to anyone who is interested.  I thought we agreed on this one value . . . that tolerance, properly understood, is a good thing.  It allows me to start relationships that I wouldn't be able to do otherwise.

But in the last few years, I have noticed a subtle shift in your way of thinking.  What started as a value of tolerance has moved to become a value of acceptance.  It's as if you or some part of you doesn't simply want me to be tolerant of others' views, you want me to agree with their views as well.  And if I don't then you look at me differently.  I get labeled as intolerant. 

You are confusing me.  I can accept a person.  I can live with their views.  I can love them and hang out with them.  But if I can't agree with them, then I am intolerant?  It's not that I'm trying to be a jerk, here.   I can't agree with them because I happen to hold opposite views.  I have a different view of the world than others do.  2+2 cannot equal both 4 and 5 at the same time.  One of them is the correct answer and one is not.  We disagree as to who knows the correct answer and we have no way of settling the dispute objectively. 

I think we can love each other, hang out and be friends even as we disagree on these things.  Who knows, maybe they'll win me over to their way of thinking.  I am a seeker of truth too.  I am open to finding it.  Maybe we'll both learn something.  Maybe they'll understand why I see things my way and they see things your way.  Maybe one of us will find the truth from the other.  Maybe not.  And more than tolerate you, I can love you either way.

As for you Culture, I don't require that you agree with my beliefs to be welcome in my life.  Please don't require it of me.  It is something I cannot give to you.  It would betray my deepest convictions.  And your attempts to make me agree with you seem, well .  . . intolerant.

matt